The Last Place Guy...

Phoenix Talon · Post by **Phoenix Talon** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 3:11 am

"Nice guys finish last."

Personally, I think my self to be a nice guy. And I seem to finish last. A LOT. So I'm quite inclined to believe this. What do you guys think about that wonderful saying?

Lara · Post by **Lara** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 4:42 am

I think it depends on the race. In relationships, nice guys tend to end up with the nicest girls and the most stable relationships, yes? Not the best if you're a player, but nice guys don't usually want to be players.

In basketball - yes, nice guys finish last unless they're very tall. Granted, I'm equating "aggressive" and "not nice", but you get the idea.

Personally I'd rather be a nice person in last place than be in first and have everyone hate my guts. Mean people aren't usually all that happy.

Deacon · Post by **Deacon** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 4:48 am

I'm nice AND tall. I seem to have been coming in last, so to speak, but only because I choose to let others race in my stead.

Rembrandt Q. Einstein · Post by **Rembrandt Q. Einstein** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 4:58 am

I'm nice, lazy, and tall. I just don't give a fuck about the fact that I come in last.

peter-griffin · Post by **peter-griffin** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:07 am

Victory versus honor. Is it worth it to win if it means using dishonest tactics, taking advantage of someone when they're down, but at the same time gaining a strategic and usually substantial advantage in whatever "race" you're in? If so, then you should do whatever it takes to win - being a nice guy isn't a priority if you can't get what you want. But, if not, then getting that victory simply isn't paramount to you - what matters to you is your honesty, integrity, self-respect and honor, and that victory doesn't mean a damn thing.

tl,dr: ya nice guys usually lose ^^;;

Teranfirbt · Post by **Teranfirbt** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:08 am

I will now link to the "Ode to nice guys"
http://www.speedtoys.com/~teranfirbt/Odetoniceguys.txt
I'm a nice guy myself, but so far I really haven't cared too much..

peter-griffin · Post by **peter-griffin** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:10 am

That link doesn't work.

Posted Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:10 am:

500 internal error. Sorry for not saying that the first time.

Wite_Rabit · Post by **Wite_Rabit** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 6:21 am

me = nice guy. me = last place

Azurain · Post by **Azurain** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 7:33 am

I think of 'nice guys finish last' the same way I think of all such trite sentiments. Which is to say, it's an utterly pitiful waste of breath/text, generally used as filler in a conversation when a person really has nothing actually useful or intelligent or perceptive to say. I'm a nice guy who generally refrains from underhanded, corrupt, or cruel behavior (except to idiots who deserve it ; ), but I never finish last. In fact, I tend to do very well with everything, and have excellent fortune... the only times I ever have difficulties tend to be when I behave in an unscrupluous or hostile manner.

It sure is a good thing for whiners to latch on to, though. They can compliment themselves by saying they're nice, and then explain away their failures as a result of said niceness. Pah.

-- Chris

Accer · Post by **Accer** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 8:05 am

Speaking strictly in the context of dating:
80% of the guys I know (or knew) claiming to be a "nice guy" of the can’t-get-a-date-when-I-want-one variety, the people that actually employ this phrase, actually aren't. Their definition of "nice guy", apparently, was "spineless", and had nothing to do with being rude to people other than cute girls, being whiny, or even with being helpful and constructive.
I don't see the two things as have much of anything to do with each other, except that being “nice” is often an excuse for being spineless, or simply an excuse for bad luck. As in, a self-fulfilling prophecy.

One that sticks in my mind proclaimed himself a “nice guy”, and I suppose he thought that because he didn’t grope girls or get into fist fights or something. In fact, he wrote nasty angsty poetry about his classmates, told bad jokes, complained endlessly, and frankly wasn’t much fun to be around. Yet his excuse for not getting a date was that he was “nice”, not that he was socially incompetent. He was a pretty extreme case though, and was institutionalized before graduation. But my point is, people often misdiagnose their own personalities.

I have known quite a few nice guys – truly good guys, I should say, and some, for various reasons, really did have a hard time getting a date. Plenty did just fine though—and not just in personal life, but in academic and professional life as well. People like working with them and being friends with them, and they get ahead because they make breaks for themselves. Maybe not to first place, but they aren't working at McD's. Modern life is about contacts and determination.

YH · Post by YH » Mon Sep 13, 2004 11:40 am

A nice way to think of it is not treating everything as a race.... though it's really hard to do so, especially in academics and professions. Damn you aggressive Americans

RhapsodiesOfWind · Post by **RhapsodiesOfWind** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 12:26 pm

Maybe it's just me, but the phrase seems like the sort of thing a mean guy made up to make himself feel better about not being nice. It seems like the sort of thing someone does to justify what they're doing when saying "there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing" isn't quite enough. Naturally, a nice guy would take such a statement to heart and be inclined to believe it if told often enough.

MissCheetah · Post by **MissCheetah** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 2:14 pm

I am with Accer here, most of the "nice guys" who can't get dates use it as an excuse for their own shortcommings. Being spineless, as she mentioned, is a big one. If you let people walk all over you then of course you finish last.

A person can be assertive, confident, polite, successful, and still be NICE doing it.

Yes, there are some guys who are jerks yet seem to always have some hot chick that they are dating. Do you really want the sort of girl who is dumb enough to fall for that?

Grow a backbone, don't make excuses, and find a bit of confidence in yourself. That often makes all the difference.

Deacon · Post by **Deacon** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 2:18 pm

[quote="Azurain";p="396077"]It sure is a good thing for whiners to latch on to, though. They can compliment themselves by saying they're nice, and then explain away their failures as a result of said niceness. Pah.[/quote]
Azurain, the sky seems to be awash with blood in the glow of crimson sun. You are making more and more sense as time goes on, getting things dead-on, which leads me to be almost POSITIVE that Armageddon and the end of time are soon to be upon us.

Grumlen · Post by **Grumlen** » Mon Sep 13, 2004 5:10 pm

Heh. I know all about not being able to get a date or a GF, but it has nothing to do with my being spineless or a mean person or what have you. I know exactly why I can't get a date. The reason is that I'm just not seen as generally datable material. Part of this is my own fault for the way I apathetically go about life, but it's also due to the fact that the 2 relationships that I have been in I've lost because of traits that are intrinsic to me and that will NOT be changing. The first actually WAS because I was a nice guy and refused to do certain things

until SHE was ready for committment, and the second was due to my religious persuasion. So yeah, overall I prefer being a nice guy and the life it helps me leads, though there are times when I almost wish I'd done otherwise.

But hey, thats just how I see it. If you guys think I'm a mean, nasty person, feel free to shoot my ego until it's dead and then blow it up for good measure.

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