Clerks is more accurate than you might think.

RhapsodiesOfWind · Post by **RhapsodiesOfWind** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 12:37 pm

I must say that today's strip was particularly humorous, especially considering that I just got home from an eight hour shift at Texaco. In the past year, I've had this conversation more times than I care to remember. It's one of those "it's funny because it's true" sorts of things. If you've ever seen Clerks, you've got a pretty good idea of what really working a day in a gas station is like ( as far as the customers go, at least ). It may just be a local thing, but I'm getting sick of spending the whole night telling customers that the restrooms are under the six-foot wide neon orange "Restrooms" sign ( seriously...no less than once an hour ). I'm still considering unplugging the ATM when I get to work just to save myself a few headaches a week.

JonnWood · Post by **JonnWood** » Wed Sep 15, 2004 8:59 pm

ATM's are easy to use. I went to one for the first time a month or so ago to withdraw $50. After I logged in, there was a QuickDraw $50 option. I know that there are some people who'll look at the pictographic instructions and go 'wha?'

PogiChoie · Post by **PogiChoie** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 5:24 am

Ah, yes, the people who abhore work so much that simply thinking about things constitutes as work. It's annoying when people can't seem to help themselves out and use a little effort to find something that is FRIGGIN OBVIOUS.

Example = IN EB Games, people come in and ask a generic question that basically means "Where's the PC stuff?" To which one of us reply by pointing to the BIG BLACK SIGN that says PC GAMES. Which, concidentally enough, hangs over some PC GAMES. Geh.

fuzzmanmatt · Post by **fuzzmanmatt** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 5:09 pm

I sell car parts, and to all of you that have cars (I know, not many) KNOW WHAT KIND OF CAR YOU HAVE BEFORE YOU COME IN TO A CAR PARTS STORE!!!
I hate it when somebody comes in and says that they need some part, like an alternator, and don't know what kind of car they drive. "A red one" is not a good answer. I need something like, "2002 Olds Bravada with the 6-cylinder." Or, in your case, "1993 Geo Metro 3-cylinder."

randomperson2 · Post by **randomperson2** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 10:45 pm

How exactly would the 3 cylinder work?

Deacon · Post by **Deacon** » Thu Sep 16, 2004 11:41 pm

Like a 4 cyl, minus one.

SevTiZ · Post by **SevTiZ** » Sat Sep 18, 2004 6:59 pm

Created when I worked graveyard shift. I'm on daytime now, but the guiding principles are still the same.

RhapsodiesOfWind · Post by **RhapsodiesOfWind** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 12:32 pm

Do you mind if I print out the Golden Rules for Convenience Store Shopping to post near the counter? If nothing else, rules 7 and 9. Otherwise, I'm going to have to start thinking of something particularly horrible to do to the next person that wants to get drunk after midnight and tells me that "every man has his price", and something similar for the next person that pulls money from some random concealed part of their bodies and gets offended because I look nauseated.

Deacon · Post by **Deacon** » Sun Sep 19, 2004 3:18 pm

RhapsodiesOfWind, every man DOES have his price. Sell him the beer for $1500. If he still wants to do it, then that's just crazy

xodin · Post by **xodin** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 3:22 am

http://www.actsofgord.com/ if you ever want to indulge yourself in the life of a video game store owner that refuses to take smeg from his customers. I highly recommend it.

RhapsodiesOfWind · Post by **RhapsodiesOfWind** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 11:55 am

RhapsodiesOfWind, every man DOES have his price. Sell him the beer for $1500. If he still wants to do it, then that's just crazy

No, I don't. I found it quite offensive...it was nauseating. As for $1500, that's not going to last long when I'm out of a job.

Kits · Post by **Kits** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 1:31 pm

Oh GOD. Convenience store clerks aren't the only ones with the stupid questions.

Stupid People I've encountered working at a HOTEL:

*after answering the phone "It's a great day at the HAMPTON INN NORTH, this is Crystal, how may I direct your call?"* "Uh...is this Hampton Inn?" me: "No Dipshit, this is Taco Bell."

*standing 1.5 feet away from a HUGE sign that says "Check in 3pm, Check out 11am"* "Uh....what time is check in/check out?" *points to sign*

*cleaning the bathroom, a HUGE unopened pack of paper towels in hand* irate customer: "Miss, your paper towel machine is out." *opens the pack and holds it out to her* "I can't believe this, this is completely unacceptable" [WTF???]

*We're sold out of rooms, and I just explained that to a customer* "Come on, I'm sure that you can help me out? *he pulls out his wallet and starts flashing money to me* me: "Sure, I can let you sleep in my CAR for a bill.....other than that we're SOLD THE FUCK OUT"

I've also had people try to bribe me into letting dogs stay, and SEVERAL propositions to 'Come up to someone's room."

BadMonkey · Post by **BadMonkey** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 2:27 pm

xodin, the Gord rules all.

Two friends of mine work in one of the bars in Dublin Airport.
Now one of them is behind the bar (been there for a years) and rarely gets any shit.
But the other guy is part time floor staff, so he gets all the shit from tired, drunk tourists.
The number one thing that gets him is when people go up to him and ask "Is there anywhere I can smoke in the airport?"
The answer is no (if you've got that far, you've passed security, so you cant go back outside to smoke, and you can't smoke in the bar), but of course that leads to "Are you sure theres noooooowhere I can smoooooke in the Aaaaaaaaaaaairport?"
There is still no where they can smoke though, so they then go
"What about any sneaky places you go to smoke? ARE YOU SUUUUUUUURE THEEEEEEEEERE..."

This happens about 20 times a day too....

SevTiZ · Post by **SevTiZ** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 3:46 pm

RhapsodiesofWind (and any other interested parties): If you want to print out the Golden Rules for posting, you're more than welcome to it. It'd be nice though not really necessary, since it's not copyrighted if you included something indicating that the list was created by The irrepressible Zordauch. Doubt it'll really change anything, though. If people EVER paid attention to signs, I wouldn't have to come up with the golden rules.

Customer: Gimme some Marlboro 27s.
Me: ID?
Customer: Aw, c'mon!
Me: {points to sign that says "WE CARD UNDER 30"}
Customer: I'm 24, I just don't have my ID with me.
Me: {evil glare, deliberately returns cigs to rack}
Customer: {Leaves, goes to DRIVER'S SEAT of car}
Me: .oO(I hope they get pulled over....)

Post by **Lizzegirle** » Mon Sep 20, 2004 9:18 pm

Ok, now do you want to hear some stupid stuff I have heard while living in Tahoe? This is just living there... not working or anything.

Setting: We are sitting on the beach.
Tourist: Excuse me, but where is the lake?

Setting: Driving down the street, right next to the lake.
Tourist: They really should have put the road on the other side of the lake.
(WTF? How do you put a road on the other side of a lake?)

Setting: Standing across the street from the lake. Looking across the lake.
Tourist: Excuse me, but where is the lake?

Now, this lake is 12 miles wide, and 24 miles tall. They estimate that the lake holds enough water to flood the entire state of California with a foot of water. THIS IS NOT A TINY LAKE!!!!

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