The Thread Dedicated to the Lamest Jokes in the World.

Post by **Blaze** » Wed Nov 05, 2003 5:55 am

HEEHEHEHE! I Liked those (though I'd heard a few)

What do you call a dog with short legs and steel balls?

Sparky. *ugggggg*

Kirstie · Post by **Kirstie** » Wed Nov 05, 2003 6:03 am

[quote="Shyknight";p="204364"]
Q: If you're going up a mountain in a canoe and all six wheels fall off, then how many flapjacks does it take to build a doghouse?

A: The answer is 13, because a banana doesn't have any bones!
[/quote]

that one hurt my head..

rawkeye · Post by **rawkeye** » Wed Nov 05, 2003 6:09 am

i actually like this one:

a pirate walks into a bar with a ship's wheel fixed to his wang.

the barkeep says,"why do you have that there?"

to which the pirate responds:"arrgh, it's driving me nuts."

Mo0 · Post by **Mo0** » Wed Nov 05, 2003 2:55 pm

I've heard that one so many times it isn't funny.

My sister came up with one when she was 3 that she still remembers today, if only because she thought it was fucking hilarious then and now she realizes it's the lamest joke ever.

"Why did the banane peel slip over the banana peel?
Because the banana peel had to go potty! *insert insane 3yearold giggling here*"

Kirstie · Post by **Kirstie** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 3:11 am

what he difference between a chicken?

Do you walk to school or do you buy your lunch?

Is it quicker by bus?

~sighs~ oh the unfunny lameness.

sneaky ninja · Post by **sneaky ninja** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 4:38 am

What do bees use to comb their hair?

Honeycombs!!

(I really did think this one was funny, but I have a dorky sense of humour

)

JeppZer · Post by **JeppZer** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 6:33 am

Hey, jokes with no good point whatsoever are the funniest ones.. like:

"Two elks was out flying, and suddenly one sad: You got a cookie in your eye.
To wich the other responds: What?
so the first elk say: I sad, you got a cookie in your eye!
and the second one then says: I can't hear you because I got a cookie in my eye!"

siriansenemy · Post by **siriansenemy** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 7:27 pm

What do you call a Jamaican proctologist?
A pokémon

Mothers have Mother's Day, Fathers have Father's Day, but what do single guys have?
Palm Sunday

What did the blonde say when she the doctor told her she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
The porcupine has pricks on the outside!

Shyknight · Post by **Shyknight** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 7:28 pm

LOL! Those are all good.

Dreamer · Post by **Dreamer** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 8:15 pm

Um, Aml, I think it starts, "A grasshoper walks into a bar and the bartender say, hey, I have a drink named after you. And the grasshopper says, 'You have a drink named Steve?'"

Okay:
Man walks into a bar and sits down, looking depressed. Bartender says, "What's the matter?" Without a word the man pulls a tiny little man out of his pocket and sets him on the bar. The little man starts running around the bar exercising and cracking his knuckles. Then the man pulls a tiny little piano out of his pocket and sets it on the Bar top. The little man runs over to the piano and start playing. "That's amazing!" Says the bartender, where'd you get it!? I wished for it. "No kidding?!" "Yeah, here's the lamp. I only got one wish. Have fun..."
The bartender runs off to the backroom all excited about his future wish. A few minutes later thousands and thousands of ducks come flying through the window and completely trash the bar.

"This is bull," yells the bartender. "This genie must be hard of hearing. I wished for a million bucks and he gives me a million ducks!"

"No, sh!t," says the man at the bar. "You think I wished for a twelve inch pianist?"

amlthrawn · Post by **amlthrawn** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 11:03 pm

Dreamer wrote:Um, Aml, I think it starts, "A grasshoper walks into a bar and the bartender say, hey, I have a drink named after you. And the grasshopper says, 'You have a drink named Steve?'"

Touché.

Dreamer's right. I f1x0r3d it.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this? Some kinda joke?"

Eihger · Post by **Eihger** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 11:35 pm

3 men walk into a bar, two duck the other one falls back

document · Post by **document** » Thu Nov 06, 2003 11:43 pm

How did the crazy man get through the forest?

Psychopath

Goddess of thy Coconut · Post by **Goddess of thy Coconut** » Fri Nov 07, 2003 2:56 am

"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"I am!"

This one made me laugh hard, but it is ruined if the person you're telling the joke to says, "I am who?", or the person doesn't get why it is supposed to be funny.

chaos42 · Post by **chaos42** » Fri Nov 07, 2003 1:53 pm

[quote="Goddess of thy Coconut";p="208343"]"Knock knock!"

"Who's there?"

"I am!"

This one made me laugh hard, but it is ruined if the person you're telling the joke to says, "I am who?", or the person doesn't get why it is supposed to be funny.[/quote]

I think that would almost make it funnier...They you not only get to laugh at the joke but you get to point and laugh at them too...

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