No Sir, I don't want to enlarge my penis.

billf · Post by **billf** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 9:18 am

the other day I got three emails that had something to do with my colon in the title... I was afraid... I wanted to reply back and tell them to stay away from my colon.

Shyknight · Post by **Shyknight** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 9:38 am

Apparently my name is 'Jose Lopez' and I need to refinance my mortgage.

Also, my breasts are not big enough.

And I'm highly interested in having anonymous affairs with married women.

And I'm into bestiality.

And I have a debt problem.

And I am interested in making tens of thousands of dollars in just weeks. I believe in the magic of pyramid schemes.

Gowerlypuff · Post by **Gowerlypuff** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 9:45 am

I think they meant your ":" key wasn't working?

Rorschach · Post by **Rorschach** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 11:21 am

[quote="siriansenemy";p="239663"] Do all of you ladies want a guy with a 9 or 10 inch long penis?[/quote]
I'm not cutting three inches off my Johnson for any woman.

Although I regularly get offers of penis enlargement, I am more worried about the unpleasant and violent uses proposed for my new weapon:
'Choke her to death with your huge dong!', 'Be the cause of massive internal bleeding!', 'Make her really uncomfortable during sex!'
Why would people want to do that?

furre · Post by **furre** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 12:42 pm

The same reason some people want to be spanked and others don't? The same reason some people never stray from a certain sexual position? The same reason beastiality porn exists? The same reason someone thought squicking sounded like a fun idea? etc. etc. etc.

daemon princess · Post by **daemon princess** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 12:55 pm

Do all of you ladies want a guy with a 9 or 10 inch long penis?

I have to say I'm extremely confused over the whole preoccupation. I have once heard a woman mention size and that was some girl trying to show off on the radio. Apart from that one time, the only people I've heard referring to size as anything other than a joke are men. Trust me, guys, that is not what she talks about after she's slept with you.

Rorschach · Post by **Rorschach** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 1:01 pm

Squicking?

Fixer · Post by **Fixer** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 1:15 pm

[quote="siriansenemy";p="239663"]Do all of you ladies want a guy with a 9 or 10 inch long penis?[/quote]
Boy, I hope so. Improves my odds greatly.

I write custom filters for spam. I rarely get many of the same. Only the idiots who write in 13375933k manage to bypass it for long.

Dragonmaster Zoc · Post by **Dragonmaster Zoc** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 1:55 pm

See! l33t does serve a purpose!

Sir Spankspeople · Post by **Sir Spankspeople** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 2:07 pm

Squicking?

Please don't ask.

As far as spam goes, I've barely gotten more than a dozen messages over ICQ in the last three years or so, and I rarely get anything in e-mail form... Recently I've been getting things written in what appears to be Japanese, though Babelfish can't translate it into more than a nonsensical string of words(duh!)... it's fun trying to find the hidden meaning in them though. I think I almost had one figured out, then I wandered off to find something better to do.

But I don't get e-mail about debt consolidation, or college degrees, or pr0n, or even penis enlargement. Though I miss getting those breast enlargement ads... I don't think that my cup size is quite as big as it could be...

daemon princess · Post by **daemon princess** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 4:22 pm

Squicking?

Please don't ask.

We could demonstrate...

Any volunteers?

furre · Post by **furre** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 4:32 pm

NO. There are NO volunteers. EVER.

Fixer · Post by **Fixer** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 4:35 pm

/me volunteers

Sir Spankspeople · Post by **Sir Spankspeople** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 4:40 pm

*shaves Fixers head and hands him a Dremel*

Okay, so we've got the Squickee, who's gonna be the Squicker?

Actually, I think this would be a case where a small penis would be desireable... at least to the Squickee...

You know it's sad when someone can bring up squicking in a day to day conversation and you no longer flinch...

Phong · Post by **Phong** » Tue Dec 16, 2003 4:42 pm

I'm sure I haven't flinched, only because I have no bloody idea what it is.

Real Life Forums

No Sir, I don't want to enlarge my penis.

Who is online